jaded. VERY.
considering that i had only like 4 hours of sleep... for an old man like me... is obviously not enough. i had a hard time crawling to school... and was late for close to 2hours. just in time for lunch. haha. i cant understand why... i know nuts about econs... and yet i'm not really as panicky as before? when exams are just a month away. got my results for the stats mock today... in my group of 7... without saying... i m definitely the least hardworking of all. but i am the 4th out of them. i scored better den i thought actually... still failed though. 27 out of 100. not too bad for a start. hahahahaoh yea... bumped into ericia in school too... pretty pretty. hahah
met up with the guys for soccer after school... and i have an announcement to make... i had decided to step down from professional soccer. HAHA... wah... i think too long never exercise... its damn tiring lor! i guess sitting back and get fat is so much easier. haha
well... i still have to go to school tomorrow... there goes my weekend. gary's gonna be away to china for work too... bon voyage!
till den... sweet dreams!
seb at 8:38 PM
Eat eat and eat.
its hard not to put on any more weight when you're working in a company like mine. not only you have friendly colleagues who keep baking and cooking for everyone in the team... the company itself is trying to kill all of us with food. haha.we were having our annual budget release today at meritius mandrin. we had this buffet style lunch which actually includes the chatterbox chicken rice! the food there is damn nice la... i cant stop myself from eating even though i really wan to. lunch finishes at abt 1pm... we had some team building games like building the tallest structure with straws. my team won the first prize. another few boxes of rochers for us to munch on... den we had tea reception at about 3pm... the makes it another round of food fest.
back at the office... my colleagues keep offering me pastries... and shannon even peeled me an orange! haha. today's actually lee hsien yang's last day in the organisation too. we had our third round of buffet at the lobby with him... can you imagine... 3 rounds of buffets in a day... this is crazy. haha
yashi's last day at work too. though she had been a nuisance to me at times... still... its sweet of her to have us a farewell gift (chocs again.... sinful). well... i might just miss her... and also... looking forward to meet my new colleague... if there's ever one to come. haha
photos time!
thanks la thanks la. haha... all the best to u.
shannon and christine... i was just trying to be funny and spoil their photo la... haha... end up getting scolded =(
hurmmm... lets just say that these r only some of the girls sitting around me.
i'm so tired la... so little time to do my job proper today. keep having to attention all these stupid functions. but i dun mind going to another buffet session in mandrin la. haha
till den... signing off... lifeless seb... home on a friday night. =/
seb at 8:50 PM
lunch in
its raining quite heavily outside now... my usual lunch kakis are all in the gym. as usual... seb's just too lazy to do anything about it. besides having a meeting with the vendors later at 2pm... leaving in about 30mins time i guess.nothing too exciting happening these days.. nor there's anything too different. everyday's basically very similar to the day before... prolly just wearing different clothes... putting on a different mask each day at work. saying the same old stuff to colleagues just the way that i think they might wanna hear. basically waiting for the week to end. but even so... for this weekend... i will still have to be back in school for my econs revision. so tell me people... how exciting do you actually find ur life to be?
i'm still pretty much waiting for my car to arrive. time seem to be passing slower den before... in fact... much slower. its not even april. oh boy... is it just me or that this should be the "standard" way of living?
yea... i hate rainy days.
seb at 1:01 PM
soccer!
meeting up with the guys this sat after school for soccer... its been a damn long while since i last exercised la... i've been so comfortable with sitting back and getting fat... but i guess its time for me to wow the rest with my impressive soccer techniques. HAHAHAsometimes i wonder if i will end up as the next soccer legend... i cant stop scoring each time i m with the soccer ball. the only word in the dictionary u might find in me is only to score. i have always been very humble... but seriously... ronaldinho isnt the best with the ball control... i've been shunning compliments... but they just come to me all the time. everyone's completely taken in as soon as they see me in action. HAHAHAHA
ok seriously... i have to really start exercising la...
oh yea... did i mention that paris hilton is damn freaking hot? hell yea... i love her to bits. HAHA
seb at 10:48 PM
untitled
it feels good to think back on the past of how i used to be... and to compare with where i stand right now at this point in life. witnessing every step i've taken... knowing how far i came alone... understand my growth in life... from a boy to a man.though commitments have very much become my burden... having to cope with stress i receive from work and school... at least i know that my life is a fruitful one. rather den spending months dwelling on some rotten relationship... i've came to sense i hope... for the better.
i know my time will come where i am gonna have wad i truely deserve. someday... someone right will share this moment in life with me. having You to watch over me... i could feel peace within. You might have planned the worst for me... prolly for a reason... but rest assured... i'm gonna walk out of it... to find my own paradise.
for even a spoilt clock is right at least twice a day. =)
seb at 11:48 PM
tired.
just got back home... finally had a chance to meet up with sandy since a long long time. and i think the last time i met her was at grapevine la... more den a year ago... haha... all the flying made you much prettier sandy. =) u better take good care of yourself too... just the way u tell me to too... or even better... hahaa lil something to keep you people wondering... what is wrong with people these days? on the way back to the station through citylink, i took some time off into the gents... and i saw this fine young girl walking out of a cubicle. alone of course. it struck me hard for a moment that i thought i was in the wrong room. i hurried back out to check out the sign... correct wad... its the gents... i went back in.. saw those urinals side by side... its not me... she's blind.
sweet dreams peeps.
seb at 10:41 PM
monday blues
hard a hard time waking up this morning. the weather gave me all the reasons i need to sleep just a lil bit longer. i was making myself so comfortable under my blanket until sugar came in and start tugging my pillow... shuffling her paws on my right arm trying hard to get my attention. i knew my sweet dreams have to end there. she's suppose to be a pet/watch dog... not an alarm clock la!train ride to work is still terrible. especially when its raining. cabin after cabins of canned sardines on a railway... cant wait to go to work. i was just one of the dead fried tasteless sardines amongst the rest. dont even know when will i be able to drive to work someday. working in town is a hazardous problem. not just on the peak hours... also your pocket.
was invited to a thank you lunch with the directors and VP for the annual staff function... luckily i think i will be skipping the meeting i supposedly should have in the afternoon because of this lunch. ahh... seb's such a cheapo... free lunch is always better den no lunch... haha... it will be at sanur restaurant.
should be meeting up with sandy after work today... but den again have to check with my after lunch work load... its been a rather hectic period for me... since a long time that i've last met up with this sweet lil SIA girl. haha... well... lets just hope its all well for me today.... keeping my fingers crossed.
and ah... my dad has this stupid problem sometimes i also cannot take it. the way he talks to those sales assistants is as if they owe him a living la... always when he thinks he is paying for the service or goods, he will naturally bring out this damn bossy tone... which can sound pretty rude at times. it isnt intentional but it just cos we know him well enough. and i always have to keep reminding him.
anyway, have a nice day people!
seb at 9:53 AM
sunday.
ok... sunday is as usual bored... but i suppose not for long la... cos my sweet lil cute car is coming soon! hahaanyway... i prepared dinner again today. cabbage seafood soup... crabstick egg.... pork chop... and chicken wings. here's a pic of it. haha
i'm a great chef huh? haha... who say men cant cook?
oh yea... here're 2 pics from last night... i can show u guys how drunk i look... haha... 
now you guys know why i m still single after all these while right? hahahahabtw... have anyone seen the KFC adverts? they suck so much that i cant stop laughing all the time. hahaha
seb at 8:14 PM
confirmation
omg... i think i m drunk. just got home from meeting gary n friends. drank a lil too much. tipsy tipsy. this post might not even make any sense.
went back down to subaru before i met up with the guys. to clear up the remaining payment. here's 2 pics of the car i will be getting... exactly the same color and design... just that i got my rims changed.
pics.
argh... damn giddy now... going to bed... sweet dreams.
seb at 12:15 AM
The Men's Rules
Got this through an email... u people gotta spend some time reading this... its cool shit. haha-----------------
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down (big ups bro)
Finally , the guys' side of the story . ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules" from the female side .
Now here are the rules from the male side. These are OUR rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you won't dress like the
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted in
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .........
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
today's such a god damn busy day. argh... i need to chill a lil later. haha.
meeting up with my cousins n some chics at PS cafe...
gotta go finish up all my outstandings for now... tata
seb at 5:17 PM
stress
the agent got back to me this afternoon telling me that subaru will now waive off the 500bucks extra for me... ask me to keep this to myself. i tell you... these sales people really will go all the way out to cheat your money one... even if the top up is true... if i told him that i m willing to top up yesterday... i bet they will gladly pocket your money... bastardsi'm so stressed up lately... work is picking up so fast that i cant even breath... exams are drawing sooo near that i m already rearing butterflies in my tummy. sigh... so much to do... so lil time... so lil money. my mum's health condition also not too optimistic... now that she has to top up her medical expenses means more money... me and my sis decided to top up the extra for her... now i'm really feeling the financial burden all on myself. its not a very good feeling to have exactly.
meeting up with my cousins for dinner at PS cafe again tomorrow night... dinner at such posh places simply means seb is more broker most brokest den usual. ah... suddenly so many things are happening...
anyone has a better paying job with very much lesser workload to introduce me? please let me know. haha
seb at 11:06 PM
untitled.
finally a lil short time-off from my hectic schedule for the past 3 days. endless development meetings that are taking up all my time... finally got to settle in today to clear up my outstanding work. my japanese colleague is here in singapore, having another different kind of meeting this afternoon with her. but i guess it wouldnt be as bad as those i had for the past few days la.yesterday was the day for my first COE bid... my agent called me up in the afternoon telling me that they have been out bidded and i have to top up another 500 bucks if i actually would like to have the car soon. initially i was contemplating if i should la... until when my colleague taught me how to check the bids they threw in for my COE. i realised that they were just a dollar lower den the bid closure. i dunno what are they really up to... but i told him that i wun pay a single cent extra. i mean... i have paid so much for this car and if ur company cannot afford to fork out that 500bucks for me... den too bad la... u dun get to have ur commission from me anyway.
so he called me up later last night telling me that he will talk to his boss about paying the extra COE for me and let me know abt the outcome by today. seriously... never ever trust a car agent no matter who's friend or relative he or she is. these sales people are highly trained and can be extremely unscrupulous.
dun say i never warn u people ah. haha
seb at 10:04 AM
tired tired tired
i tell you... i've been soooooo busy lately that i hardly even have time for anything else. i'm so involved in the development of some new system that we will be using for my products... that meetings have been so frequent and it usually last for the entire day... which includes over time. to the extend that i dun even have time to do my job proper... and everything else in my mail box is piling up. argh... and those discussions we have during the meeting is soooo mind taxing that i cant even think straight everyday after work.met up with sv and mc after work yesterday for a short dinner... den i realised that its been 2 mths since i last met them! gosh... so tied up with school and work... that i didnt even notice how fast time flies... i reach the office when dawn just break each day... coming home when the moon's already up and shining. no proper meals... ah... i need a pay rise. haha
anyway... my agent just gotten back to me this morning telling me that my loan has been approved. he continued with my COE bidding today... which supposingly is to end by tomorrow noon/evening? well... hopefully he doesnt get me to top up anymore... i'm so broke.
i'm still thinking about my rims... hurmm... now its not only the M factor... but also i cant decide what kind of rims i wan... the color and the design. =/
guess i'll be tuning in soon... i can barely keep my eyes open.
some told me that i need a woman in my life... why? bah.
nite pple. =)
seb at 8:41 PM
sugar day.
just got home not too long ago from school.... the UOL revision begins now till after the exams for me... its drawing soooo near that i could feel it right down my neck. haha... but seriously... i dunno if i can really be bothered about it... its draining my life juice DRY.
decided to do a lil shopping for my darling sugar earlier on after school...
and this is wad i got her (not very healthy i know la... but she's a fussy eater... and she loves it. its ok for her to have this once in awhile right? haha).
den i left her playing with that bounce ball i've got her...
my dumb dumb blur blur lil darling is just so sweet... watching it roll away from her. haha
aite... thats all folks.
seb at 6:59 PM
saturday
my saturday these days are sooooo similar to the many other sats i was having for the past 1 month. at home at home at home... be it i study or not la. sigh... lifeless me.met up with my cousin cynthia n husband hanpin.... leong.... meefong and eric at PS Cafe last night. its a damn nice place to chill la... but not very convenient to get there without a car... very green house off town kind of place. nicely decorated... nice food nice drinks. =) i'm going there again on friday next week with my other cousin jamie n yekai.
well... i guess i had a lil problem with my car loan back den on thursday... hopefully things can be resolved soon (before wed) else i'm gonna miss the 21st COE bidding. =(((((
hurmm... really love this mtv fei ni mo shu... i wish i could have a love experience like tt.
一份傻傻的爱情，单纯又天真的那个你，让我感觉好幸福。但，幸福，你又在哪里？
guess i'm going back to slack again yea... tata
seb at 5:17 PM
rims. change or dun change.
i knew it wun just end like that... after having to decide which car i'm gettinng... now the sales person brought up another question to me about changing my original rims into the wrx rims. i mean... not that he's trying to get more out of me la... but it really looks nice on the car i think. haha... but the prob is i have to top up another 650. argh... thats alot leh... i keep paying n paying even before i can get my ass on the car. but if i dun change now... i wun be able to trade my original in in future after wear n tear... so if i ever decided to change again... i have to pay 3 4k leh! =(should i? should i not?
anyway... on the train to work today... i caught this sweet lady right infront of me... she was doing some read ups on this book called beginners for Norwegian or something like that. suddenly what ifs thoughts started flashing past my mind... suddenly i can imagine myself speaking fluent Norwegian and she is so amazed by it and we became friends. HAHA... ok... i'm just tired in the morning. hence creating my own interesting morning.
-------------------------------
now to clarify some questions that i cant stand people asking me anymore:
your dad bought the car for you?
would your dad buy one for me too? comon! this is my sweat n blood!
are you sure u can pay off everything on time?
if my heart doesnt stop beating any moment... i'm pretty sure i can... thanks for the concern.
issit tough on you?
to a certain extend... yes. imagine few hundred bucks lesser to spend each month. but still managable becos i'm actually sharing the cost with my sis. we're sharing the car.
did they give you any freebies?
ermmm not that i know of becos i fitted this car with almost all the original subaru impreza's accessories. but they did gave me a few hundred bucks off the original price though.
how much are you paying for?
check for the web price for the impreza and less a few hundred bucks off it. it really depends on what you want for a car... a cent for an inch... literally. do your maths properly... including the yearly depreciation and when is your break even. unless u intend to keep the car forever.
so when are you getting your car?
they were telling me end of april. but honestly.. nothing is firm yet becos they are still waiting to bid for the COE. if in any case they require me to top up any more... i will just cancel my order. so i might end up with no car afterall? haha
good enough? email me if u still have any burning enquires about a young man owning a subaru.
seb at 9:06 AM
made up my mind
ohhhh you people should just know that seb cant stand having tooo many choices... haha... so many pretty cars to consider with such lil budget. i'm just a poor man... no money buy expensive cars. so after thinking for sooooo long... finally... i've gotten my subaru impreza yesterday. yea... gotten it. haha...now just waiting for the COE bid... the loan approval... and if nothing goes wrong... i should be getting my new baby by the end of april. *prays hard*
anyway... last night was too dark for my lousy phone camera to take any decent pictures of the car to show u peeps.... (told u i'm a poor man)... but i've took one at home of the subaru booklet the sales guy have given me.
here it is... exactly the same car and same color... just that mine includes the whole body kit. haha
urban grey (you know... those grey shiny grey? yea)... waiting waiting waiting impatiently. haha. the very first car i bought myself. =)
seb at 9:22 AM
how how how!?!?
yesterday when i got home... i tried studying for this stupid IBM paper... and i tell you.. this unit really lives up to its name... every single batch of student are always complaining that this is a damn dry unit... true enough... i doze off all the way till this morning after reading 3 pages of the notes... i'm soooooo dead.anyway... now i'm having 2nd thoughts on the vios n mazda... my dad was telling me that the subaru impreza and the lancer looks good too...
he said: hiyo... toyota's everywhere on the road... this new one 50+k somemore... u could have just top abit more to get a tougher one.
me: ... abit more pain leh.
the prolly more justifiable from the monetary point of view.
here're 2 more to my headache...
subaru impreza TS
lancer
PEOPLE... HOW HOW HOW
seb at 9:10 AM
decided?
ay... my last mock is on thursday... and i still cant seem to get myself to study at all... i've also applied my leave for may during the exam period... sigh... its sad to see my leave all go just like that... how about my australia trip??? =(anyway... i think i've decided on getting the new vios. not that i dont like the mazda 3... but its slightly more expensive... and that model has been around for more den 3 yrs... rumours said that they r coming out with a new facelift too... so i reckon that i would prefer a cheaper... a new facelift... a more fuel saving car.
here's how the new vios is said to look like.
yea... see how things go... wanted to make a trip down to borneo this sat... but my agent is still on reservist... prolly either this sun or next week i guess.. =)
seb at 9:36 AM
Sugar and Coco
my auntie just got herself a shih tzu this afternoon... and we wanted to name her yoga becos the way she lies down resembles my sister's yoga position.. but my auntie den decided to call her coco instead.
coco's extremely lazy la... she lies down after walking every 2 steps. unlike sugar when she was younger.
anyway... just to share the pics with u guys.
coco... the size slightly smaller den a tissue box.
sugar and coco... they seem to get along pretty well. haha
hurmmm... maybe i should get myself another pooch too... HAHA
seb at 12:23 AM
Seb the Chef
i got soooooo sick and tired of studying when nothing can stay up in my brain. but if i were to go out... i would have feel guilty too. so i've decided to be the chef for the day... as usual the famous seb's fried rice on the menu!
1. prepare egg, hotdog, crabstick and garlic
2. fry the egg first
3. break it up into smaller pieces
4. fry the garlic bits first before adding the rice
5. mix the hotdog and crabstick. make sure its cooked
6. lastly, mix the egg.
a lil something special today too for my beloved sugar. made her hotdog + luncheon with pork floss topping mixed with her doggy dry food.
1. prepare luncheon meat with hotdog cubes
2. fry both with minimum oil (dun use oil also can)
3. leave the cubes over a piece of tissue for it to absorb the oil (healthier choice)
4. mix everything into the bowl including the dry dog food. top it with the pork floss.
5. and its now ready to be served!
p.s. sugar finished everything except the dog food lor. she's a damn fussy eater.
---------------------------------
just a passing thought
have you ever miss my cooking?
seb at 6:25 PM
sigh
i wish i could spend forever watching sunrise with you, till the sun sets.
sigh.
so ever lonely.
seb at 1:04 AM
爱情交易
曾经被一份我所珍惜的爱情伤透了心，照成了我今日对爱的恐惧。对于时间是否能米埔我心灵所受到的创伤，实在的，我还不明了。偶尔也许还会在时空里徘徊着，但我那残缺的心早已失去了理智。
说真的，我何尝不想和大家一样能享受恋爱的过程，婚后的幸福。但或许这次也大概不想再受伤害，对于心爱的人也有所保留。随着岁月的痕迹，我想，这一切也慢慢变成了我的习惯。 从此接受了自己一个人生活。
也许这爱情的交易可能会换回我一生的孤单，但我不介意。与其宁可爱着一份真正属于我的爱，也不想爱错再受伤害。
seb at 6:49 PM
Annual Staff Function
I was sooo tired yesterday. it was my first Annual staff function with Singtel @ 1827 Thai Restaurant. i was rather entertaining la... but i'm not very involved. i felt more like an unpaid photographer rather den a staff who's part of this function. the place was too small too to accommodate all of us. quite a few didnt turn up too.
join quite a few of them at MOS yesterday after dinner... am so tired even till now.
anyway... did i mention that my department are mostly women (still got a few other pretty ones all didnt turn up lor. =/ )?
let the pics do the talking.
and also... toyota already stop selling the vios u people see on the road. the new 2007 model is coming out at the end of the month. they are already taking in orders for the new vios. the price went up quite abit too.
thinking... thinking... sigh
seb at 4:58 PM
car or no car?
today we all get to go off at 3.30pm due to our annual staff function. in some silly thai 1827 restaurant behind the parliament building. i've seen the interior of the place... though it looks quite nice... i still think that a company like this should at least have their D&D somewhere better? prolly a hotel at least. and not some thai 1827 restaurant with BUFFET. =/anyway... since my sis just started working.... we're both contemplating of sharing a car. we're considering cars like vios... mazda 2 and 3.... chevrolet aveo or kia cerato. but the 2 that topped my list would be the vios (which my cousin have recently gotten) or a mazda 2 or 3.
a friend of mine who's working in the backend with toyota had introduced me a friend of hers from the salesfloor. she was also telling me that the new facelift of vios for 2007 will only be launch at the end of the year. so its still quite safe to get it somewhere around this time. the only thing is prolly that the COE had just went back up.
vios
and a mazda 3
issit gonna be a sports factor... or a $$$ factor. hurmmmm
anyway... not this month la... might be the next mth or the month after.
seb at 11:11 AM
untitled.
缘分也许会在你最掉以轻心时，擦身而过。 甚至就这样从此也没再出现。但我相信，在这世界的某个角落，会有一个只属于我的人。到她出现的那一天，我会耐心等待。把我最真诚的爱，为她而留。
只有了解我内心深处的她，才会明白其中必有的奥妙。 只有她，我才能找到我的归属感。只有她，才能踏入我的心房。
相爱真是可欲，不可求。
期待着能和你相遇的那一天。
-------------------------------------------
我心中从前那另外一个她，因该真的消失了吧？
分手也有好些日子，大概也已经忘了。
seb at 2:17 PM
back at work.
today almost didnt feel like a normal working day. after the short monday i had which was fully packed with meetings ONLY... after that i went on a 2 days MC. being back today in the office with a lil bit of hang over... tispy dipsy still... UNTIL I GOT DOWN TO MY MAILBOX. i really had a hard time sorting out all those mails that are really related to me with the rest of the "show mails". people these days just enjoy sending what they have done or will do to the rest of the world... just in case if noone knows that they are actually working.was on the phone till 3am this morning and i cant even think straight now. not even with coffee.
bah... suddenly feel sick again. and that bloody ulcer on my lip is KILLING ME.
seb at 9:35 AM
stress
my days can only get worse i think. now i'm not sure if its the earthquake that causes my head to spin or issit that i'm really exhausted. i'm on MC for 2 days (today and tomorrow). thought that it might be just do me good with ample time to prepare for my 2 papers this week. but only this afternoon did i realise that i actually have my stats paper today.i tell you... rushing the entire unit in 2 hours is impossible. but still... i eat and bath with my notes... travel with my notes. i reckoned that i can score more den 25marks for this paper la. sigh.
when i got home after the paper... wanting to clear up some work related mails... to my horror... i've 90+++ unread mails staring right at me. sometimes i really wonder why are You doing this to me. to make a better seb out of it? or are You just killing Your boredom at my expense? so in case that You're not aware of it.... HELLO... I'M DYING DOWN HERE.
i really wish i can enjoy myself like many of you out there. having all the time in the world to enjoy what you're doing at work... chilling with friends.... slouching back on your sofa infront of the television. THATS LIFE. i've got none. and its really freaking me out. all i do everything is work work work work.... study study study study. i cant help it... not that i enjoy whining. i've never appreciated anyone who used to whine to me in the past. never... not till now that i've been through shit myself.
seriously i wouldnt mind if i work so hard but i can at least see tangible results. but it all seemed like i'm doing all these for nothing at all. its sooo traumatising. so discouraging. i dun even feel like studying for my papers tomorrow. i really wanna just bury myself under my smelly blanket and die there.
oh yea... thats it.
seb at 11:14 PM
unwell.
i dunno if its too much mugging... or too much junk food... i'm not feeling well today at all.everything started well initially... before i left home. but i started feeling giddy when i'm on the bus to the train station. it got worse when i alighted. the first thing that came to my mind was that i better not roll down the escalator... damn malu... no image. so i got hold of myself... took a deep breathe in... and continue travelling.
so even till now... i'll still feeling giddy... not worse... but not any better. i wish i can go on mc today... but i'm suppose to have this important meeting with my boss and the vendors in the afternoon.
besides, i really do have tonnes of notes to go through. sigh.
hang in there seb.
seb at 10:14 AM
Sugar's First Birthday
finally we had a chance to meet up with everyone in the family today. though it was just a short 15minutes... but i guess its good enough for us to sing 2 birthday songs.
dont wanna spend too much time blogging for now... got alot more to study. sigh... i can almost feel the entire weight of it on me.
here're some of the pics we took earlier...
dont wanna spend too much time blogging for now... got alot more to study. sigh... i can almost feel the entire weight of it on me.
here're some of the pics we took earlier...
happy 1st birthday darling. i love you!
"i'm proud to be me!"
lets blow the candle together ya.
my lovely family.
like peter berger pointed out: "The fundamental sociological problem is not crime by law, not divorce but marriage, not racial discrimination buy racially defined segregation, not revolution but government."
i would have topped them up with: "it was never hate, but love to begin with. nothing feels sad without experiencing happiness. never a failure without a set of standards that we would have hope to pursue."
back mugging. =(
seb at 7:41 PM
Changi board walk.... revisit.
this is the dunno how many times i'm there at the board walk... once again... taking a break from all those evil notes that i've been reading all day long. but sad to say... i've yet to meet my perfect sun set.
just to share the only 2 shots i've made today.
i wish we could have watched this together.
for a wait that will never come true.
seb at 2:30 AM
dreams shattered.
yea... my life changed... truely...poorer.
=(
but nevermind la... shuilin said i still have her...
i'll try again for the next angbao draw den. haha
seb at 10:15 PM
counting down.
i was so tired when i got home that i locked myself up in the room for a short nap. den later only that i've realised that i've missed the cake cutting for my dad's bd yet again. guess i really have to make a point to really remember tomorrow. sighits about 30mins away from the draw... its gonna be me ! haha
anyway... here's a couple of pics which i've taken using my phone cam. just for the fun of it. =)
i'm waiting for a call that may never come
even keyboards have placed "u" and "i" together.
i've written a letter to you. whoever you are.
pick it up someday... will you?
seb at 8:43 PM
D day
today's definitely gonna change the life of a few others. the great grand 10million bucks draw result will be out this evening. i wish... i wish... that i'm gonna be one of the winners la! i'm sure i do stand a chance, cos even that beggar in hongkong also can become a millionaire over night... if he had his chance... i'll have mine too! hahahpre-lunch thoughts
if there's something that could change my life... this lottery draw would be it. definitely.
when they say that chances come by when you least expected... its prolly telling you to watch out. you wouldnt wanna miss any of those fragile pieces i'm sure.
seb at 10:52 AM
thursday ends.
today's such a bad day... not only did it not start off well... it didnt even end well too... how can i even forget to bring my dad's cake along with me after leaving the office? argh...i'm falling back into my depression. suddenly feeling pain all over myself. physically. which somehow den leads to an emotional down time.
here's a pic to end this lousy day (pardon me for my handwriting).
where feelings would sometimes linger along that particular part of a timeline, taking me back for a walk through memory lane. oh sweet time flies like how meteorites collide. could a man never to perfect life without his soulmate. my fair lady... where are you? i miss you. but silly me... when i dun even know you. come by soon will you? i'll promise never to let you go.
seb at 9:44 PM
thursday morning.
traffic this morning was hazardous. i've missed 4 trains more den the usual. buses and trains were packed with people... den i reckoned that it could be the rain. its always the rain. it just affect everything doesnt it? not just on our daily routines... somehow... it tingles that emotional tonsil within your inner most self.i felt the crowd in motion... boarding and alighting my everyday bus... passing in and out of my everyday train. brushing shoulders and backs. but that doesnt bother me at all. i was only engross in my own thoughts... watching everything goes by myself outside the window... like an old film i suppose. i could only feel how alone i am.
besides blogging this now in the office... i bet noone knows exactly whats with the chores that they're on. they just type what they've always typed... prolly saying what they've said the day before. and if you have ever tried asking anyone about it... they should be telling you the obvious. they might even sound confident with it. with the least consciousness, most have long gone blinded by artificial implants.
where does my world revolves around now? prolly like how singtel or singnet is operating their services... with intermittent signals. sometimes i thought i knew where i'm heading... else i should be sitting back on my arm chair at home wondering why on earth am i still here. its always a neither nor kind of thing...
suddenly reminds me of teletubbies... they topped the kiddy box office for awhile... den later it just died looking spastic.
bah... its just another rainy day... feeling the same old way for a long long time i guess.
seb at 10:58 AM
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